Parola Island The Pink Beach of Camarines Norte free essay sample

A secret paradise in Camarines Norte. This island have white sand, crystal water and mini virgin forest. The peacefulness, the the unforgettable experience and simpleness of this island was unforgettable place in your life.No one is island but this island is the one of the best island Ive ever seen. (Paki correct na lang). This is Calalanay Island in Jose Panganiban Camarines Norte. If you want to escape the reality, forget any stress, heartbreak in your life, and to make a new and unforgettable memory it is the best place for you.Calalanay Island is located in Jose Panganiban Camarines Norte. A landmark dotted by magnificent tress and verdant grass fringed by white sand, the island offers sufficient spot shade and flat surfaces for any one to pitch a tent.To reachable the island its take time to travel around one (1) hour to see the secret paradise in Jose Panganiban. We will write a custom essay sample on Parola Island: The Pink Beach of Camarines Norte or any similar topic specifically for you Do Not WasteYour Time HIRE WRITER Only 13.90 / page You injoy the the white sand and especially the blue-green water its means the beach its to deep.There are no resorts on the island so you definitely have to bring your own survival kit items and food. Youd have to bring these, if necessary.†¢ Tent, umbrella, protective under layers, hammock†¢ Food and water containers†¢ Flashlight, candle, fire making tools†¢ Sunblock or after sun lotion, insect repellents†¢ Your own gadgets and power bank.First you must reach Camarines Norte if you will be coming from outside the province.By Air: The nearest commercial airport is in the Naga Camarines Sur. From Manila take 40 minutes plane ride to Naga. Then take a public van or bus to daet Camarines Norte then take another public van or bus to Jose Panganiban. You can take a tricycle to municipal office and ask locals to get to larap port. By land:From Manila take a bus heading to Panganiban Camarines Norte it will found Cobao and Pasay terminal. Travel time is around 8-10 hours. Once in Panganiban look for tricycle to municipal office, ask them to get larap port.

Bad vs. Badly

Bad vs. Badly Bad vs. Badly Bad vs. Badly By Mark Nichol I don’t want to make you feel bad, but because so many writers handle this issue badly, I’m going to discuss the use of bad and badly. Let’s start with badly, which is an adverb. Roughly speaking, an adverb describes how something is done: â€Å"She handled the news badly.† Bad, on the other hand, is most familiar to us as an adjective, but what stymies us sometimes is that it can also be an adverb. In adjectival form, bad provides detail about the noun it accompanies: â€Å"I have a bad feeling about this.† As an adverb, bad modifies the preceding verb: â€Å"Now I don’t feel so bad about it.† If you’re in doubt about which adverbial form to use, test it by replacing badly (or is it bad?) with a synonym, such as poorly. (â€Å"She handled the news poorly.†) That looks and sounds right. But would poor work? (â€Å"She handled the news poor.†) Definitely not; the form badly is correct. Now test the sentence that uses the adverbial form of bad: â€Å"Now I don’t feel too poorly about it,† or â€Å"Now I don’t feel too poor about it†? Hmm I’m not sure. So I’ll try another synonym: â€Å"Now I don’t feel too wretchedly about it,† or â€Å"Now I don’t feel too wretched about it†? The short form is the clear winner here. But why? What’s different about the two adverbial forms? The issue is complicated by the fact that two types of verbs exist: action verbs and linking verbs. Handled, in the first example above, is an action verb because she handled she did something. Linking verbs, on the other hand, describe a state of being: I think, therefore I am. One set of verbs that can perform both functions action and linking are the sense verbs, including feel. (The others are look, smell, and taste; I’ll discuss the omission of hear later.) The sentence â€Å"I feel the breeze† refers to an action; your body is responding to the breeze. If you are unable to feel the breeze because your skin is not sensitive, you could say, â€Å"I feel the breeze badly,† in the sense that your body is ineffective at feeling the breeze. (This usage is awkward and therefore rare, but it is correct.) However, if you’re using feel in the linking, or state-of-being, sense, feel refers to your emotions, not your tactile ability. If you have asked someone to join you on a walk, and the person is bothered by a strong breeze that suddenly whips up, causing some distress oops, there goes the hat! you could say, â€Å"I feel bad about the breeze.† Wouldn’t badly work just as well? Apply the synonym test: â€Å"I feel wretchedly about the breeze.† Clunk. â€Å"I feel wretched about the breeze.† Click. That explains why you want something bad, not badly. (To want something badly is to do a poor job of wanting it almost the opposite meaning.) That’s why you’re not doing too bad, rather than badly, right now. Bad is a condition (a linking verb), not a performance (an action verb). So, why isn’t hear an action verb, like its sensory siblings? You can write, â€Å"That feels disgusting† and substitute feels with looks, smells, and tastes, but â€Å"That hears disgusting† doesn’t make sense; we replace hears with sounds in such constructions.† Why is this so? I can only give you my stock answer for such curiosities: It’s English. Want to improve your English in five minutes a day? Get a subscription and start receiving our writing tips and exercises daily! Keep learning! Browse the Grammar category, check our popular posts, or choose a related post below:25 Subordinating ConjunctionsRunning Amok or Running Amuck?Drama vs. Melodrama

Essay Man for all Seasons by Robert Bolt Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 750 words

Man for all Seasons by Robert Bolt - Essay Example Bolt says in his Preface, e is harder to find than a unicorn...but I thought I heard once or twice, a rueful note of recognition.(xviii & xix). In the steward, the boatman and the jailer, all these contradictory elements are portrayed. All demonstrate the virtue of working hard for a living. Matthew faithfully serves More until he can no longer pay him the wages he is accustomed to, and can perceive the differences between a good person and one of little integrity, as he shows contempt for Rich. The boatman, though moaning about running costs and family commitments, seems to know his business and does his job well. The overly-cautious jailer says of his occupation, t's a job like any other job.(Act 2 p. 75). There are actually indications of some loyalty, which could be construed as worldly wisdom and shrewdness, but whatever the motivation, they exist. Matthew gives Cromwell and Chapuys useless information, hat I can tell them is common knowledge!..everyone wants value for his money.(Act 1 p. 25). The boatman stays to serve More, despite recognizing the power of Cromwell, he coming man. while the jailer refuses the fifty guinea bribe, I want no part of it. They can sort it out between them. I feel my deafness com ing on.(Act 2 p. 80). Matthew feels guilt when refusing to stay with a poorer More, but resentment flares because of how he perceives the world, believing More is tricking him when he expresses affection and says he will miss him. "Miss me What's in me for him to miss...I nearly fell for it. (Act 2 p. 57). It is not his nature to understand More's affection, considering he only wants a cheaper servant. So greed and expediency are presented, along with 'looking out for Number One.' Further proof of this is shown when he goes to work for Rich, h, I can manage this one. He's just my size!(Act 2 p 62), suggesting he sees similarities in their characters, things he does not respect, but accepting that is the way in his world. With the boatman, though willing to serve More, seeming to like and respect him, his own needs are paramount, expect you'll make it worth my while, sir.(Act 1, p. 14). The same attention to the self is expressed by the jailer when he orders More's family to leave on the dot of seven, des pite knowing this is their last moment together. 'm a plain simple man and just want to keep out of trouble.Act 2 p. 88). All three are motivated by serving their own needs, keeping themselves safe no matter what. They all lack moral courage to stand up for someone or something they respect and know to be worth supporting. These elements which exist in the Common Man in all his guises are present in every person. The 16th Century is declared at the outset as the 'century of the Common Man, but Bolt wanted to show the audience that this character is timeless. He is not necessarily bad or wicked, but like everyone, has virtues and vices, and is swayed by circumstances encountered in life. There is no doubt that he recognizes an intrinsically good person, but has not the courage or conviction to be associated with

Organizations Going Through Change Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 250 words

Organizations Going Through Change - Essay Example After forming the new organization comprising of 70 people, the next step was to develop links with communities, they include in-house community, technical community, platform community, and portal community (Kodama, 2003). The company employed three strategies simultaneously to deal with other communities. Adding to these three strategies the company used time pacing strategy that involved developing public relations, and advertising its services. Another aspect of the company’s new organization was Entrepreneurial strategy that offered a motivation for the employees to put in their maximum and take the company’s new venture to next level. GBD was formed by Mr. Oboshi for handling i-mode or mobile internet, this individual organization was very small in size compared to the traditional organization that comprised of over 10,000 employees. GBD relied heavily on the traditional organization for investment and support. However, GBD’s strategy was entirely different from its parent company’s strategy. GBD relied on time-pacing, which meant continuous change and less time for adaptation. GBD could have used event based pacing like its parent company. Further time-pacing strategy also creates intra-organization pressure within the team members, and adds stress which can spoil the organizational harmony, and create hindrances for

Impact of internet social and political Essay Example for Free

Impact of internet social and political Essay The internet is less than two decades old but its impact has been felt by almost everyone in the global village. It has not only revolutionized our personal interaction habits but has also impacted greatly on other spheres of our life, most notably the economy. In many societies, the digital technology has not only influenced the political communication but also the whole political systems. Shapiro (1999) suggests that the digital technology has captured the attention of everyone from the media, government and the general public. Although the invention of the internet has brought with it some negative aspects, the digital technology has been hailed as the man’s new road to the better world. This paper will try to discuss some of the aspects of the internet that have continuously impacted on our social and political behaviours as citizens. Computers and the internet have greatly facilitated and expanded the individuals’ capacities in every sector of the society. Gurstein (2000) contends that the new ICTs have impacted almost everyone from institutions to business to organizations to the political arena. The impact has been so great that every sector of our society feels obliged to embrace the information communication technology in order to either improve the running of the government, community networking or to improve the citizen participation in the new information society. Terms such as â€Å"citizen networks†, â€Å"digital cities† or â€Å"e-governments† have become common expressions these days. They simply imply the new ways of interactions that exist between the governed and the government and new ideas regarding the metropolitan policies, through the use of electronic media (Sclove, 1995). The urban settings, built landscape as well as the social setting in our society, has undergone tremendous transformation from the last decade into the new millennium. The citizens have also not been left behind in this era of transformation. What we consider space, time, and our perception of politics as well as what we consider public or private and local or global has greatly changed. The advancement in the information communication technology has largely contributed to the changes in our cities and contemporary societies (Tsagarousianou, Tambini, Bryan, 1998). There is a new concept that has caught on with most people in our society concerning governance. The term â€Å"electronic democracy† though has been in use since 1960s when most activists introduced a number of communication medias like free radio stations, to make the governments more accountable and responsive to its citizens, has found its way back in the advent of the internet (Sclove, 1995). Internet is currently being used to marshal grassroots groups to support a certain cause by most civil activists. There is also a growing mass of citizen initiatives that help to shape public opinion and thus influencing policies both at the national and local level. The internet therefore has greatly challenged the hitherto monopolies of the most political classes through better communication networks that have empowered the citizens to create a form of democracy in the society (Schuler, 1998). Today, many cities around the globe have created home pages in the internet and forums for interaction with their city residents. Governments around the world both at the local and national level in developed and developing nations alike, have invested in e-government projects through networks that enable citizens access to government structures, engage in online transactions or to get information on government policies. Some of these networks and sites have enable citizens to participate in most decision making regarding the management of urban habitats (Underwood, 2002). The internet has great potential to amass groups of people persuasive to certain ideologies. Many organizations now have websites which they use not only to communicate with their members but to recruit more like-minded individuals into their groups. Indeed the internet has become one of the major tools for lobbying citizens to a particular cause. Such organizations as the Internet Society and Voters Frontier Foundation have been very active in recruiting and educating the public on political issues in America (Tsagarousianou, Tambini, Bryan, 1998). These groups have greatly contributed to the policy making processes through intensive lobbying. The internet has therefore provided a better platform for the citizens to actively participate in the political arena. This development has actually dealt a big blow to the interest group politics that have gone on over the years (Davis, 1999). The internet has impacted greatly on how we interact these days. Due to its widespread and accessibility, the information communication technology has completely changed the forms of social engagements. Today, there are numerous social networking sites that have increased the speed at which we do interact and organize our social activities. The most notable ones are MySpace and Facebook, which have simply taken the social interactions to the next level. These sites not only make it easier to keep in touch with friends and family members but enable subscribers to find other friends online. The era of information communication has ushered in a new way of keeping contacts with others no matter the distance between us. In a nutshell, the internet has reduced the world to a global village where everyone can be reached simply by a few clicks of the mouse (Subrahmanyam Greenfield, 2008). The social networking sites have also been very important in educating the public on social and political problems afflicting the society. There are groups of people who have formed social forums and recruited individuals with like-minded views on the social and political events in the country. Members would be easily reached through the internet and topics as well as current affairs discussed. These forums have been quite helpful in bringing change in the political and social arenas in our country. It is the emergence of the internet as a political tool that some countries like the Myanmar, Iran and China have censored its usage among their citizens. These countries have restricted contents of political and religious materials that are accessible to their citizens (Shapiro, 1999). Again, a new internet phenomenon has emerged reshaping the politics and political activities in many countries around the global. What has been referred to as the internet activism has caught on in many countries and political players and citizens alike have embraced internet to win masses into their camps and political groupings (Tolbert, McNeal, 2003). The current United States president Barrack Obama owes much of his political success to the internet. He amassed overwhelming campaign funds that enabled him outmuscle his opponents in the 2008 elections simply by recruiting a greater mass of followers through the internet. The citizens who were eager for change contributed wholeheartedly to this cause through internet donation. What was most remarkable was the overwhelming following Obama was able to attract over a short period of time in politics. Those who contributed included even non-Americans, who found it easier because of the internet. The internet has also provided leisure activities to its users through social entertainment sites. Currently, there are a number of forums that provide games, videos, and cartoons to entertain internet users. The internet has also enabled easy access to news and information. People these days are able to watch and listen to news, book for vacations, get information on weather and many other things of their interest. There are also thousands of blog sites that have not only provided a platform of communication but have enabled most people to interact by sharing views on various happenings around them. The blog sites have also become political tools most citizens use to lobby people onto their way of thinking (Rodgers, 2003). During the early stages of its development, in the early 1990s, the digital technology led to what many considered internet-euphoria. Many optimists believe it was the new dawn to mankind’s participation in social, political as well as economic spheres in his society. These euphoric evaluation has somewhat changed over the years as more people are now becoming more aware of the dangers technological advancement may pose to the society (Engel, Keller, 2000). There is the issue of lack of internet safety as the social networking sites have proved to be. The critics of internet claim that it may increase cyber thefts or deceits because one may be able to steal one’s identity especially from the social networking sites. The challenges posed by the internet to the political activities have been cited as some propaganda wars between nations which may spill over into real battles (Tolbert, McNeal, 2003). Conclusion The internet has profound altered our societal operation both in political and social spheres. The citizens will continue to access vital information that would eventually empower them which in turn will reshape the politics and political class that have long governed with their interest-based policies. Again, the internet has proved to be a better social tool in our society because it has made interaction easier than before. However, there are a few challenges that must be overcome to make it safer for every user.

Eating Disorders: A Feminist Issue Essay -- Health Bulimia Anorexia Fe

Eating Disorders: A Feminist Issue What is a feminist approach to understanding eating disorders? Not all feminists have the same understanding of eating disorders. There are many different theories that are prevalent in feminist literature today. This web page will explore some of the different feminist perspectives about the cause of eating disorders in our culture. Power Control and obedience In her book Unbearable Weight, Susan Bordo (1993) makes the argument that the fear of women's fat is actually a fear of women's power. Thus, as women gain power in society, their bodies dwindle and suffer. She states that "female hunger--for public power, for independence, for sexual gratification-- [must] be contained, and the public space that women be allowed to take up be circumscribed, limited... On the body of the anorexic woman such rules are grimly and deeply etched" (Bordo, 171). Naomi Wolf (1991) has a similar explanation of the origin of eating disorders in her bestseller The Beauty Myth. She states: "a cultural fixation on female thinness is not an obsession about female beauty but an obsession about female obedience" (Wolf, 187). Women who remain thin are being obedient; it is another way for patriarchy to control women. "If women cannot eat the same food as men, we cannot experience equal status in the community" (Wolf, 189). Sexuality Sexuality is another issue that feminist Naomi Wolf explores in an effort to understand the prevalence of eating disorders among women. "Fat is sexual in women. . . to ask women to become unnaturally thin is to ask them to relinquish their sexuality" (Wolf, 193). Women who develop eating disorders, especially anorexia, are denying their sexuality and natural female b... ... disordered attitudes and behaviors. Psvchology of Women Quarteriv. 2-0, 2. Goodman, Ellen. (1996). The skeleton look is in fashion. The Tennessean. June 1 1. Mahowald., Mary Betody. (1995). To be or not to be a woman: anorexia nervosa, normative gender roles, and feminism. Nagging Questions. Ed. Dana E. Bushnell. Boston: Rowman Er Littlefield. Martz, D. M., Handley, K. B. Er Eisler, R. M. (1995). The Relationship between feminine gender role stress, body image, and eating disorders. Psychology of Women Quarterly, 19, 4. Morris, B. J. (1985). The phenomena of anorexia nervosa: a feminist perspective. Feminist Issues, 5, 2. Orbach, Susie. (1978) Fat Is A Feminist Issue. New York: Berkeley Press. Swartz, L. (1985). Is thin a feminist issue? Women's Studies International Forum, 8. 5. Wolf, Naomi. (1991). The Beauty Myth. NewYork: Doubleday.

Criticism Philosophy Essay

Not too many people can listen none defensively, or none antagonistically, to criticism. And very few of those who listen admit it when they see that they are wrong. The thing is, we think that admission of guilt, or of being wrong, or that we have made a mistake, is a sign of weakness. Yet true failure is repeatedly refusing to see your faults. Learning to listen to criticism is a life skill that we’d all do well to master. It is about keeping our hearts open (deferring judgment), and ensuring that we are not emotionally aroused (intimidated, irritated, etc.) by our critic (this is deferring reaction). Learning to listen to criticism is about carefully absorbing what is being said, and then honestly evaluating if it is fair, true, constructive or destructive. Only after we’ve carefully listened to and evaluated the criticism can we respond to it. SECTION B: HOW TO TAKE CRITICISM 1). See criticism as an opportunity to work together with the critic to solve the problem; not as an adversarial situation. Even if you can’t solve the problem together with the critic, consider the moment they criticize you as an opportunity for all of you to grow from whatever the problem is. See it as an opportunity for straightening things out; as an opportunity to hear them out, question them where you need clarity; and as an opportunity for you to clarify what needs to be clarified. This calls for changing your mindset; for changing your attitude (from an adversarial one to a positive one) towards criticism. 2). View criticism as valuable information about how to do better, not as a personal attack. Criticism, regardless of whether it is used as a constructive or a destructive tool, can provide us with valuable feedback on our performance. It provides us with feedback on where we’ve fallen short, and that (i.e., knowing what we need to improve on) is important for our learning and growth. So even when your critic uses criticism as a destructive tool (e.g., as a personal attack, or as a way to put you down, or as a way to manipulate you, or as a way to maintain a psychological advantage), identify his intention but decide to pay particular attention to the criticism itself. Evaluate the criticism itself, and identify what feedback you may get from it. To be able to evaluate the criticism, you must †¦ 3). Listen carefully to what is being said. This is taking up all the data, and evaluating it to see if it has any validity. 4). Watch the impulse to defend (See Defense Mechanisms): Just listen and evaluate. Know the difference between emotional thinking and rational thinking; use your head, not your heart. Don’t give in to your emotions (be it laughter, anger, fear, or whatever): simply listen! 5). And if the criticism is too upsetting, ask to resume the meeting later; after a period to absorb the difficult message, and cool down a bit. SECTION C: HOW TO GIVE CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM 1). BE POLITE AND SENSITIVE. This is a call for empathy; for being attuned to the impact of what you say, and how you say it to the person on the receiving end. The person (on the receiving end) is most likely to be defensive. S/he may resort to loud and angry words, or may even cry. Be ready for whatever reaction (including rebuffs, or attacks to hurt you back; breaking down into tears; begging you for forgiveness and sympathy; and so on. There is a whole catalog of reactions to criticism: be ready for any of them, and maintain your calm). 2). BE SPECIFIC. Don’t criticize the whole person (by using global labels or sweeping generalizations). It is demoralizing for people to know that there is something wrong without knowing what the specifics are, so that they can change. Focus on the specifics; saying what the person did well, what was done poorly, and how the situation could be changed. The following approach is very effective (I call it the VWXYZ-approach): V – Tell the person what they did well (â€Å"You did this and that very well.†); W – Tell the person how happy you are, and/or how beneficial to you (or to the organization) this positive input was; X – Tell the person what was poorly done; Y – Tell the person what the damage means to you (or to the organization); Z – Give the person suggestions, if you have any, as to how the situation can be changed or rescued. Tell them how they would be expected to handle a similar problem in future. 3). OFFER A SOLUTION (See Z above). The critique, like any useful feedback, should point to a way to fix the problem. Show the person other possibilities and alternatives. 4). BE PRESENT. Critiques, like praise, are most effective when given face to face, and in private. Writing a memo, letter, or email robs the person receiving the criticism of an opportunity for response or clarification. In conclusion, you have to differentiate between criticizing someone and fighting them because of your own secret agenda. When you criticize, you want the person to improve, so that s/he can be better, or so that you can live in harmony together. But when you fight someone, you criticize out of hate or resentment: your agenda is to hurt, not to help. SECTION D: THE MYTH OF REALITY We all see reality through different colored glasses. Our feelings, inborn abilities, psychological make-ups, personalities, egos, characteristics, physical or emotional well-being, fears, desires, needs, wants, beliefs, and so forth, all play a role in our perception of reality. The assertion, †THERE ARE NONE SO SURE ABOUT (THEIR PERCEPTION OF) REALITY AS THOSE WHO ARE TOTALLY DELUSIONAL,† has a grain of truth in it; at least when it comes to things that can be disputed. Since our perceptions of reality differ, those who criticize us do so based on the perceptions (of reality) that they have in their minds. Our critics’ perception of the reality of what they are criticizing us of usually differs from ours. If one perception can be demonstrated to be 100% correct, then those on the wrong side of perception should admit that they are wrong, without any fear of being conceived as weak! The real truth is that admitting that you are wrong (when you realize that you are) is a sign of being strong minded. If, as in many cases, none of the various perceptions of the conflict-causing situation can be demonstrated to be 100% correct, then we should acknowledge that our perceptions are different, and simply agree to disagree. Before you criticize someone, be sure that your own perception of reality is 100% correct. If you are not so sure, be sure to point out from the onset that you (and the one you are criticizing) have different perceptions of reality, but you are not sure whose perception is correct. You may then criticize the other person’s perception, and then defend your own. SECTION E: TYPES OF CRITICISM Behind each criticism, there is an INTENTION to either put down the one being criticized or to help them (i.e., to build them up). Whether one intends to build up or to destroy, they will use STATEMENTS which are either FACTUAL, or FALSE, or (as is usually the case) a MIXTURE of TRUTHS and LIES. To analyze and evaluate someone’s criticism, we have to LISTEN very carefully to what they say. If we are not sure that we have heard them correctly, we have to SEEK CLARIFICATION. We have to: I). IDENTIFY THEIR INTENTIONS (to help or to put down); II). DETERMINE THE MANNER IN WHICH THEY CRITICIZE US (are they patronizing/condescending/adversarial or tactful/sympathetic/building up?); III). DETERMINE WHETHER THEIR INFORMATION IS ACCURATE OR WRONG. We must SEPARATE FACT FROM FICTION. We now look at the different types of criticism. 1. CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM This occurs when your critic is motivated by the desire to help you; that is, when the person who criticizes you means well. Their manner of presenting the criticism may be good or bad, and they may possess facts, or a mixture of facts and fiction, or only inaccurate information. But the important thing is what drives the critic is the desire to help you. 2. DESTRUCTIVE CRITICISM In this kind of criticism, your critic’s intention may be one or more of the following: 2.1). PUTTING YOU DOWN. This may be in the form of a pointless nagging, or habitual recitation of your failures, or calling you names when they criticize you, or making sweeping generalizations; 2.2). ONE-UPMANSHIP. This occurs when one tries to maintain a psychological advantage over you, or to prove that they are better than you; 2.3). MANIPULATION. The critic may criticize what you are doing in an attempt to get you to do something else. This is often called CHILD PSYCHOLOGY. o SECTION F: RESPONDING TO CRITICISM There are two ways of responding to criticism; one is Ineffective Response, and the other is Effective Response. 1. INEFFECTIVE RESPONSE STYLES These are: 1.1). AGGRESSIVE STYLE. The techniques used include: – Counter Attacks; – Insulting or name-calling; – Loud Denials; – Mocking (Cynicism); and – Sulking in anger. This style of responding to criticism is adversarial, and often leads to fights and/or resentment. 1.2). PASSIVE STYLE. In this style of response to criticism, you agree, apologize, or surrender at the first sign of (a usually destructive) criticism. You may panic and tremble physically. Or you may remain silent in a coward manner (which is different from sulking angrily). In this response style, you give your critic too much power, while sending your own self-esteem crashing rock-bottom. You do not seek clarity, and you do not even try to defend yourself. You do not try to give clarity, even where you feel you have been misunderstood, or wrongly accused. You may even take responsibility/blame for things that you have not done or said. Your fear overpowers you, and you just wish to be left in peace! 1.3). PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE STYLE. This may involve being silent, but not fully cooperative. Or you may respond passively by apologizing and agreeing to change, only to get even with your critic later; by not being fully committed to whatever you promised; or by botching it up; etc. 2. EFFECTIVE RESPONSE I). TRY TO DETERMINE YOUR CRITIC’S PERCEPTION OF REALITY. When someone criticizes you, ask yourself what may be their perception of reality; ask yourself what may be driving him/her to criticize you. Remember that we all see reality through different colored glasses. Resist all urges to respond (aggressively or passively, through panicking or being submissive) before evaluating the criticism. If you are not sure what your critic’s perception of reality is, and if you are allowed to, ask them (See III below). If you are not in a position to ask them directly, evaluate their criticism; for you may get, from the criticism itself, an idea of what your critic’s perception of reality is. In any case, it is important to be sure of what your critic’s perception of reality is. II). EVALUATE THE CRITICISM. It may be possible to tell from your critic’s tone of voice, from their facial expression, or from their posture, what their intentions of criticizing you are. It may be possible to tell this from context (this applies especially when you get a written critique). It is important to IDENTIFY what your critic’s INTENTIONS are. Whilst evaluating your critic’s criticism, do not jump into conclusions, and do not rush to responding. Forget your self-esteem, and concentrate exclusively on the criticism. – As already mentioned, you first have to identify your critic’s perception of whatever they are criticizing you of. – Next, identify the critic’s intention: Do they wish to build up or to destroy/hurt? Is their criticism constructive or destructive? – Next, determine the manner in which the critic gives the criticism: is it good or bad? Are they patronizing/condescending, or are they considerate of your own feelings? Hear their tone. Do they want to help or hassle? – You may also take into consideration your relationship with the critic. Is it a loved one? Is it your boss or superior? Is it a friend? Or is it someone who doesn’t even know you that much? Whatever the case, you want to live in harmony with the critic; but you also want to correct misconceptions. You want to clear the air, and clarify what needs to be clarified. – Check whether the criticism is accurate. Is the critic using facts, a mixture of truths and lies, or only lies? III). PROBE. As already pointed out in I), when someone criticizes you, they have a certain perception of what they are criticizing you of, and it is your right to be sure that you correctly understand what they say. – Ask your critic to be specific; not to make sweeping generalizations. – Ask him to support his claims. – Ask him whether he is sure of what he is saying. – Ask him what his perception of the situation is, and whether he is sure that his perception is correct. – Ask him to give examples of where you went wrong, and to tell you how you should have performed in those instances. – Ask your critic to tell you exactly What you must do. Having probed the critic, and having evaluated his criticism, decide whether his criticism is constructive or destructive; decide whether his manner of presenting the criticism is good (considerate) or bad (patronizing/condescending); and whether the information he uses is accurate, inaccurate, or a mixture of truths and lies. We now give guidelines on how to respond to (constructive and destructive) criticism. 2.1 HOW TO RESPOND EFFECTIVELY TO CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM. Depending on your critic’s nature, he may couch his constructive criticism in terms of good suggestions for change, or he may patronize you. However well-meaning someone may be, patronizing and/or condescending (which occurs when someone tries to appear better) is bad, and is likely to provoke an adversarial reaction. This is because when someone is patronizing us, we are bound to feel uncomfortable, and we may give in to impulsive negative reactions. So even when your critic has good intentions, the MANNER of GIVING the CRITICISM may spoil it all (See â€Å"HOW TO GIVE CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM† in ‘CRITICISM PHILOSOPHY I’). In criticizing you, your critic will use some statements which are true or false, and/or some statements whose truth values may be unknown. He may have accurate or wrong information. – If, in criticizing you constructively, your critic uses accurate information, or facts, to patronize you, or uses facts in a condescending manner, you may acknowledge the truth or validity of his point(s), but point out that his patronizing (or attempts at appearing better) is spoiling or defeating his good purpose (i.e., to help). – If your critic puts his (accurate) information in a good manner, acknowledge the facts and thank him for pointing them out. Tell him that you are going to consider his points. – If your critic’s information is inaccurate, you may correct him. Thank him for trying to help if his manner is good; but if, in addition to using wrong information, your critic’s manners suck, tell him that not only is his information inaccurate but his patronizing or condescending is really uncalled for. – If your critic uses a mixture of facts and lies, acknowledge the facts (and give thanks for them), and correct misconceptions. 2.2 HOW TO RESPOND EFFECTIVELY TO DESTRUCTIVE CRITICISM Let’s now suppose that you have determined, to your satisfaction, that your critic’s intention is not to help you, but: to put you down; or to maintain a psychological advantage over you; or to manipulate you. As in the constructive case, your critic will use some statements; some of which may be true, whilst others may be false. In handling such a critic, simply acknowledge what is true and refute what is a lie. Disprove what needs to be disproved, and state your opinion on what is neither here nor there. It is important not to pick a fight, but to concentrate on the criticism.